I flew across the country this week to surprise my son in college. I hadn’t seen him since June and missed him. I had low expectations for how much time I would actually get with him. He is a junior and has a full life. Demanding classes. Labs. Manager of the band. Activities morning to night.
When I waved to him as he stepped out of a Monday morning lecture, he was shocked. We hugged. Then I saw the gears start turning in his head. He was running through how my unexpected arrival would affect the next three days of his life. At lunch he was scanning his calendar and firing off texts.
Only later did I realize my son was busy excusing himself from events that no longer seemed important and making sure I could come with him to the ones that still were.
For a whirlwind couple of days, he kindly weaved me into his college life. He gave me a personal high-speed tour of the school’s art museum, complete with stops at Andy Warhol and Claude Monet and a bust of Augustus and some ancient Egyptian pottery. We dropped in on his friends’ dorms and he introduced me like I was actually cool. Best of all, I got to rehearse—in uniform!—with the school band as they prepared for their Saturday halftime show. I played the all-important cow bell.
Here I went to surprise my kid and, honestly, my kid ended up surprising me.
The night before I left he hung out in my hotel room till long after midnight. We watched a Dodgers game and he caught me up on the last three months. It was all the things a dad could want.
A busy life doesn’t leave much room for spontaneity. But every once in a while, doing something crazy is absolutely the right decision. When those opportunities come, make sure you say yes.
And be ready to add some more cow bell.






It’s awesome you have such a relationship with him that you can do this. Some might cringe at the surprise drop in of their parent!
Thanks so much for sharing! This could've quickly gone all wrong but it didn't. Personally, if my parents showed up to my college experience unannounced, I would be grounded for life! ;)